It's pretty important to show up for ones life , isn't? So twice I failed with this experiment of 500 words a day. The whole point is that no matter what, I write 500 words a day. Not skip a day and bust out two blog entries to catch up. Not to rest my mind for a day, find inspiration on YouTube or your facebook postings, but to write every single damn day. Excuses can pile up quickly, making that clear road ahead steeped in mortal fatalities. So from here on in I hereby promise to write 500 everyday, well for 16 more days at least.
My excuses started yesterday afternoon when I got off from face-timing with my gal. I felt a little fatigued, throat aggravated and muscle sore. I laid down for a spell, but business calls denied me the ever loving disco nap in the afternoon. Getting to the gym I had some transactions to do and a quick trip to the bank to get my Hapkido and Yoga teachers paid. Done. I knew I didn't have to teach so I worked the front desk for a few hours. My most senior student walked in, forgot to bow and addressed me as "man." A big no no in the dojo world of martial art nerdism. As a black belt, I have to deal with all the personalities of my students, young and old. But as I have journeyed down this path I realize all the time its the students that have to deal with my personality as their teacher. A responsibility that burdens me at times. There are times where I just want to train, learn and leave. But I can't, I have to keep on learning more and more just to be able to teach. I have to be patient and kind while teaching , which I don't at times as I just want them to shut up, do the techniques so we can go home.
Even a black belt has white belt dreams. He wants to be one of the guys, he wants to out wit, out fox the teacher so he tries every silly idea in his head. He is so certain that this time he will succeed. They never do. Its here I step in and talk about the value of practicing your basic steps and to explore without aggression, fail without fear of pride wounding. Then I remember why I teach. I love helping other men become better then when they first walked into the dojo to when they leave.
So I had a quick chat with said senior student on the importance of leaving all your problems, ego and frustration of the day outside the dojo. He got and pushed on with his yoga and jiu jitsu practice. I got a reprieve of rest and though on how I could be a better teacher to my students. A better man, a better Paul. I realized all I needed to do is show up, bow to the sunrise and begin my daily tasks. Meditate while mopping. Listen deeply while another is talking and being honest with where I am today. Excuses makes for sloppy technique and life without quality or worth. See you on down the road.