I think I mentioned in Day #1 post under the 500 Days project that the clear road ahead is often paved with well driven failures. I would like to add that the clear road is often narrow and uneven. Just cause you can see the road's details clearly you may not be able to see whats beyond the near horizon. Ok, what are you talking about Paul? Too often when difficulties come we seldom check out motives till it's too late. If gone unchecked, how can we respect and learn from those "well driven failures?"
I had eluded to a potential big writing project. Well it came, had promise, but it did not happen. Of course there was a little disappointment but never despair or anger. I made sure I did everything I could to be respectful to my work and professional to the client. Now this could have been a nice financial gain for me, I'm not going to lie. But money was not my motive, my self worth and time was. But when the deal went away there was not on once of rage or anger. How so?
Well I never got ahead of myself with the deal. I kept my expectations in check. By doing so I told a very small group of people about it I think 4 or 5 in total. This is key as I see so many people making premature social media announcements about their career that if I gone that path I would be racked with fear or failure. This is so important to check that ego or it will burn you big time. We now live and die online so keep those proclamations to a minimum and eventually never proclaim anything til the work is done.
By stating my worth I gained respect from the client and in turn I found a greater respect for the client as well. It was a healthy exchange so how could I take it personally that the agreement was not meet? Too often after our ego spills the news, craving attention and approval, we victimize ourselves by placing the anger and blame on the client or person of interest. This is not becoming or fruitful. It shows a deep insecurity in our abilities and that we can turn on friends and employers.
Check yourself? You'll know if you misstep with a person or client during your dealings. Check yourself, after a disagreement do you still have a healthy relationship? Are you dependable, talented and positive? or are you spiteful, mean and disrespectful when talking about said dealings? I've come so far in these areas of life that I was actually very proud of myself after hearing the bad news. I did it, I showed my worth, and gained a friend to where bigger things will probably happen down the road. Down the road, we are gonna want those friends along the way. I do know this, you will fail and fall, but if you can do so with grace and courage I know you won't be alone. Help is always around that corner.
I check my motives constantly. Something I never use to do for most of my younger adulthood. It nearly destroyed me, that unchecked ego. But I can say, I'm very different when is comes to my ego and daily walk. Check your motives, you might be a bit frighten by them but they are manageable. Just be honest with yourself. I found that honestly has completely elevated my spirit and giving me daily joy. See you on down the road.